8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter
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8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter is an episode from the fourth season of the FOX animated television series Family Guy. First aired on July 10, 2005. Written by Patrick Meighan, and directed by Greg Colton. Production code 4ACX11. The title of the episode is a parody of the original title of 8 Simple Rules (8 Simple Rules for Dating my Teenage Daughter).
Plot summary
When Peter goes to the pharmacy to buy condoms, he realizes he has forgotten his wallet. Mort Goldman, the pharmacist, offers to open a tab for him; Peter quickly begins spending unnecessarily. (He buys a case of syrup of ipecac so he can hold a vomiting contest with Brian, Chris and Stewie, however, it was a complete failure.) Soon Mort calls in Peter's debt of $34,000. In desperation, Peter seizes upon a picture of Mort's son Neil, who is infatuated with Meg. Peter offers to sell Meg to the Goldmans to settle the bill, offering a contract; Mort agrees, but everyone is shocked to discover that Neil has started dating another girl. Meg becomes unexpectedly jealous and hunts desperately for a boyfriend to make Neil jealous; she ends up settling for Jake Tucker, who only wants her to buy him things. She finally tells Neil that she wants to be his girlfriend and signs the original contract to prove her sincerity; the Goldmans quickly put her to work as a slave plowing a field in their front yard. Brian finds a clause in the contract stating that it is null and void if Neil cheats on Meg, so Peter convinces Lois to dress as Mystique and seduce him at a fake X-Men convention. Neil tells Meg that he only wants her to be with him if she wants to be with him, tears up the contract, and quickly reconciles with his previous girlfriend. Meg's relief quickly gives way to renewed jealousy.
Meanwhile, Meg has complained that she is tired of babysitting Stewie while their parents go out, so Lois interviews candidates for a new babysitter, including a couple of Portuguese fishermen, and a Gloop (from The Herculoids). Stewie instantly falls in love with Liddane, an attractive young applicant. Lidanne already has a boyfriend, however, and in a jealous rage, Stewie clubs him with a tire iron and locks him in the trunk of Brian's car. When Liddane rejects Stewie's advances, he drugs her and tells Lois that she invited friends over and that they were "smoking merry-ja-wanna and heroinne! And they were all taking eczema and touching each other!" Lois fires Liddane, who departs tearfully after giving Stewie a mixtape. Stewie regrets his actions and pursues her, but she has disappeared. Weeks later, Stewie realizes that he forgot to release her boyfriend.
Cultural references
- The title is a joke on the TV show 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, whose title comes from W. Bruce Cameron's book of the same name.
- Peter makes several references to the product I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
- The scene in which Stewie tests his "teleportation pods" and merges with Rupert is a spoof of the 1986 movie The Fly.
- While stopping at Goldman’s Pharmacy, Peter imitates an Excedrin commercial. He also buys several copies of the fashion magazine Marie Claire, only to be disappointed by the physical appearance of actress Kathleen Turner.
- In a cutaway, Peter buys a "breakfast machine", which turns out to be a Rube Goldberg device which shoots him. The breakfast machine itself is the same breakfast machine featured in Pee Wee's Big Adventure. The music used in the scene was taken from the movie.
- In a cutaway, Meg interrupts the television show Everybody Loves Raymond to tell the world that she hates Neil.
- In a cutaway, Stewie appears on the reality show Blind Date, known for its humorous captions
- While interviewing potential babysitters, Lois interviews Gloop, a protoplasmic blob from the 1960s Saturday morning cartoon series The Herculoids, who often looked after the title family’s son. When she rejects him, Tundro, a triceratops-like creature from the show, shoots his signature energy rocks at her.
- Stewie mocks Lois’s hairstyle, comparing it to that of track star Bruce Jenner.
- The show parodied the 2004 crossover film Alien vs. Predator, which pitted the Xenomorphs from the Alien film series against the Yautja of the Predator series, with a scene from "Kramer vs. Predator," pitting Dustin Hoffman's character from Kramer vs. Kramer character against a Yautja.
- Stewie rented the first series of Jiminy Glick, and fantasizes about being Glick.
- Stewie fantasizes Brian re-enacting the Matthew McConaughey's character Wooderson's line in Dazed and Confused in front of the pool hall: "That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."
- During Stewie’s tirade against Jeremy, he derides him of the type of person who frequents Taco Bell late at night, plays hackey sack, watches downloaded episodes of The Simpsons, and memorizes the jingle from "Mr. Plow."
- After Stewie kidnaps Jeremy and throws him in the back of Brian's car, he throws him his iPod so he can listen to The Strokes as he "gasps for air," although he mistakenly calls them "The Streaks."
- Stewie screams Lidanne’s name as the camera enters of bird’s eye shot, mirroring Captain Kirk’s enraged scream of “Khan!” in [[Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan]].
- In the episode’s final scene, the Griffins trick Neil to coming to a shady hotel by advertising an "X-Men convention". Neil came dressed as Wolverine and Lois dressed as Mystique to seduce him.
Trivia
- Liddane is named after Liddane Sanders, the production controller of Family Guy and American Dad!. On the subtitles and closed captions when this episode is on, her name is spelled "LaDawn".
- At the end of the episode Peter mentions "Next week I run for mayor of Quahog, do I have what it takes?" No episode with this plot has aired as of yet.
- In the last scene, Neil calls Cecilia after he voids the contract with Meg. However, if the viewer looks at the phone, it is actually upside-down (so the receiver is in Neil's ear, and the earpiece by the mouth). It is unclear whether this was intentional or a mistake by the artists.
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