Pointy-Haired Boss
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The Pointy-Haired Boss (often abbreviated to just PHB) is Dilbert's boss in the Dilbert comic strip. He is notable for his gross incompetence and unawareness of his surroundings, yet somehow retains power in the workplace. In the Dilbert TV series, in which he was voiced by comedian Larry Miller, the character was notably smarter and more actively evil.The phrase pointy-haired boss (or more usually PHB) has acquired a generic usage to refer to incompetent managers. It is also possible to speak of someone being pointy-haired or having pointy hair metaphorically, meaning that they possess PHB-like traits. A company which has too many PHBs getting promoted to higher-levels is often called a PHC, or pointy-haired company. The academic version, a Pointy-Haired Dean (PHD), is similar.
In Dilbert
The PHB's real name is never mentioned in the comic, although in one episode of the TV series (The Return) he signs for a package using his line dancing pseudonym "Eunice." Later on in that episode, he has two other aliases, which are posted on the "Most Wanted" board in the post office (however, he thinks that is because they like him). Creator Scott Adams has said that this is because it is easier to imagine the PHB as one's own boss when he is not given a name.
The Pointy-Haired Boss is mostly bald, except for a fringe of hair across the back of the head, and sideburns that rise up in points. Scott Adams has admitted that the Boss's odd hair was inspired by devil horns. He used to have [[wikt:jowl|jowl]]s at first because Scott wanted the character to look gruff, but the boss ended up looking dumb instead.
In early strips, when he was simply "balding", the Boss was very cruel and uncaring (shocking people with electric belts or wanting them to work 178 hours a week, although there are only 168 hours in a week — he expected the employees' families to contribute a few hours). However, when the hair reached its current state of outright pointiness, he became a complete imbecile. The Boss is frequently childish, immature, ignorant, and rude, yet also annoyingly cheerful and oblivious to his own actions. In some strips, however, he displays an above-average intelligence.
The boss made his most significant change in appearance during one month in the fall of 1991. The last confirmed sighting of the jowly boss was in the strip dated September 20, 1991. His backside may have been seen in the September 26, 1991 strip, however. He went unseen for several weeks during a protracted series about Elbonia. He reappeared on October 21, 1991 without the jowls and with the pointed hair.
The Boss's family sometimes makes an appearance in the strips, and are frequently presented as being as incompetent as he. In 1998, the Boss's son, who hid in the attic for four years instead of attending college, was hired for the company and made VP of marketing due to his complete lack of knowledge. Years later, the Boss's wife was hired as a receptionist for the company. Both the Boss's wife and son share his trademarked hairstyle, as do many managers in the comic strips. The Pointy-Haired Boss finds pointy hair as a positive and attractive feature, and often judges people based on the pointyness of their hair, such as when he promoted an employee named Ted because of a pointy "beard" that was growing on his forehead, or when he became attracted to Alice because she styled her hair like his. The PHB also has a brother named Phil, the ruler of "Heck" (a subsidiary of Hell).
Within Dilbert's company, the PHB represents middle management. The corporate CEOs and vice presidents of the firm are constantly changing and are usually minor characters without developed personalities. The strip is seldom particularly shy about killing members of upper management.
There is an unspoken but subtle running joke in the Dilbert chronicle. While the boss is "clueless", it is the boss who has a social life and family, while the "smart" ones who work for him have no social skills to speak of, and appear destined never to reproduce.
Traits
Typical traits of a PHB:
- Does not understand what his employees do for a living.
- Enjoys using buzzwords such as synergy, leadership, centrex, bandwidth, accountability, blindsided, evangelize, leverage, unified messaging, competency, collaboration, empowerment, quality, paradigm, team-enhancing, outside the box, radar screen, memorialize, and culture-shift often to escape having to commit or be precise.
- Pretends to understand technology, but is really clueless. Example, "Let's make all our wall outlets digital", or, "I told you we need mutimedia fax machines!". He often shifts towards buzzwords (see above) to compensate or change subject.
- Makes excessive use of spurious statistics to distract the listener from his lack of understanding of what they mean.
- Is socially awkward, control-centric, and somewhat sociopathic.
- Easily mesmerized by silver-tongued sales people peddling management or technology fads.
- Decisions seem random or capricious.
- Gross failures of logic, such as holding repeated long meetings to discuss why a project is behind schedule.
- Gross failures of accountability: when questioned on sources of his "facts", credits unnamed "consultants" or "studies"
- Likes meetings because he/she does not know how to use email properly or does not want his/her bad decisions committed to writing. Occasionally will have several instances of Microsoft Outlook running at the same time and doesn't understand why.
- Uses his employees' ideas and presents them as his own, almost always to the same employees.
- Amazingly, can be awarded Manager of the Year recognition, while being bossy, bullying, spiteful and a thief.
- Appoints unqualified sycophants over competent specialists unconcerned about their torment.
- Bald-facedly tells people outside his current target market that they are worthless to him.
- Is always right. Or at least, thinks he/she is.
- You warn him / her to do X or else Y will happen. He doesn't do X. Y happens. You somehow get the blame.
- Doesn't seem to remember anything beyond a month's range.
- Rewards employees based on how well they stroke his/her ego instead of how well they do their job.
- More focused on sounding important than being important.
- Is normally short.
- Has pointy hair.
- Enjoys golf or other typically white-collar pastimes.
- Has no technical skills at all, Wally once tricked him into believing that deleting files from a computer would lower the computer's weight.
- Doesn't remember what he majored in during high school: "I don't need to remember what I can write down".
- Can break anyone's self-esteem, ego, and motivation.
- Will employ anyone — even animals and various critters.
Other fictional characters with some PHB traits
- David Brent (The Office, BBC original)
- Michael Scott (The Office, NBC adaptation)
- Arthur 'Big Guy' Carlson (WKRP in Cincinnati)
- Bill Lumbergh (Office Space)
- Mr. Poe (A Series of Unfortunate Events)
- Frank Waturi (Joe Versus the Volcano)
Related acronyms
The usage of PHB to refer to a character type resembles the usage of BOFH and PFY, both also derived from specific fictional characters. Less closely related is the military term REMF, which is descriptive rather than a reference to fiction.External links
| Dilbert |
|---|
| Characters |
| Alice | Asok | Catbert | Dilbert | Dogbert | Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light | Pointy-Haired Boss | Ratbert | Wally | Minor characters |
| Spin-offs and other media |
| Animated series | | [[Plop: The Hairless Elbonian]] |
| Terms |
| Cow-orker > Imaginary productivity |
| Other |
| Dogbert's New Ruling Class > Elbonia | Dilberito | Scott Adams |
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