Rainier Wolfcastle
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Rainier Wolfcastle (voiced by Harry Shearer) is a fictional character featured in the television cartoon The Simpsons. He is a German-accented, musclebound actor obviously modelled on action film star and California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (he even admits that he is the son of a Nazi). This is due not only to his physique and action-hero persona, but also to the fact that his ex-wife, who appeared in one episode, is named Maria (as in Schwarzenegger's wife Maria Shriver), and that he was seen at a gathering of members of the Quimby family, who are obviously modeled after the Kennedys. Wolfcastle is a veteran of many violent action movies, most notably the McBain series, but it is frequently suggested that his career is on the decline. He seems to battle frequently with weight problems, though tries to pass it off as something he is doing for a role (referencing Robert DeNiro's acting method, as in Raging Bull, in which he packed on the pounds to play a boxer on the skids).
The character was originally referred to both within the show and by the production team as McBain, taken from the fictional franchise of action films the character appeared in of the same name. However, for a short time The Simpsons could not use the McBain name due to the fact that a movie of the same name (unrelated to The Simpsons character) was released in 1991. During this time, the movie's producers refused to give Twentieth Century Fox and Matt Groening's production company clearance to use the "McBain" name, so the name of Rainier Wolfcastle was used to sidestep this. Later, the use of "McBain" as both Wolfcastle's alter-ego and continuing series of films returned to the show.
The name "Wolfcastle" probably refers to the Castle Wolfenstein series of computer games (which are set in Nazi Germany) or from the German town Wolfsburg, which means Wolf's castle, while "Rainier" is a spelling variant of Rainer, a common German given name. Also, "Rainier" is a common reference to Mt. Rainier, a large volcano approximately halfway between Portland, Oregon and Seattle, Washington. Most Simpsons character names come from streets and landmarks near Portland, the hometown of Simpsons creator Matt Groening.
Rainier Wolfcastle has, in different Simpsons episodes, been a presenter at the Academy Awards, a spokesperson for the Powersauce energy bar, a celebrity judge in radio station KBBL's contest "How Low Will You Go" (along with Krusty the Klown and Madeleine Albright), and appeared on Inside the Actors Studio with James Lipton. He was married to Maria Quimby in the past, and his daughter Greta dated Bart in one episode. Wolfcastle has also been seen attending meetings at Republican Party headquarters (perhaps a further reference to Schwarzenegger). He began his acting career as a child in a commercial for Fritz Schnackenpfefferhausen-brand bratwurst in Austria. He also was co owner of a Planet Hollywood spoof, along with "Chuck Norris, Johnny Carson's third wife, and the Russian mafia."
Apart from the McBain series, Wolfcastle also played Radioactive Man in an ill-fated live-action movie version of that comic book series.
Although Rainier Wolfcastle appears to have political ambitions, as noted by his candidacy for mayor in the recall election of Mayor Diamond Joe Quimby, he has not yet attempted to run for the governor's seat currently held by 15-season incumbent Mary Bailey. This may have to do with his immigrant status, or his possibly scandal-ridden past. Nonetheless, he is a member of the Springfield Republican Party.
Rainier is somewhere between 6' 2" and 6' 4".
Filmography
- Bloodletter IV (and presumably by extension Bloodletter, Bloodletter II and Bloodletter III)
- License to Detonate (Licence to Kill parody)
- On the Fatherland's Secret Police (On Her Majesty's Secret Service parody)
- View to a Corpse (A View to a Kill parody)
- You Have the Right to Remain Dead
- Undercover Nerd (played Eugene Q. Punymeyer)
- McBain: Let's Get Silly
- Radioactive Man (film cancelled)
- * speculated as being based on the cancelled Superman Lives movie -- however, this Simpsons episode aired in 1995, predating the 1998 Superman Lives controversy
- Saving Irene Ryan (Saving Private Ryan parody)
- Help, My Son Is A Nerd!
- My Baby Is an Ugly Man (co-starring Rob Schneider)
- The Incredible Shrinking McBain
- Nudist Camp Commandant
- McBain 4: Fatal Discharge (Obviously McBain's I, II AND III)
- an untitled movie in which he plays a fat secret agent
- several gay porn movies.
McBain Theme Song
The rules that constrain other men,Mean nothing to McBain.
The punches that bring pain to other men,
Mean nothing to McBain.
McBain! McBain! McBain!
(From "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?", Season 2)
Quotes
- "My eyes! The goggles do nothing!" (after having a vat of sulphuric acid dumped on him in a movie scene; this quote has passed into Internet parlance and is used after viewing something ugly or unpleasant)
- "Three divorces in three months, what can I say, I'm a romantic." (explaining why he has to sell his home and all his possesions)
- Upon being asked how he slept at night after starring in an 80 million dollar movie: "On top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies."
- "My Ferrari! I had to do awful things to pay for her!" (after Marge wrecked his car)
- After being told his shoes are untied, and spending a long time examining them: "Upon closer inspection, these are loafers."
- "I have purchased the Springfield YMCA. I plan to tear it down and turn the land into a nature preserve. There, I will hunt the deadliest game of all... man."
- "Now for my Woody Allen impression. 'I'm a neurotic nerd who likes to sleep with little girls.'"
- "One highway, zero city." (after Homer asks what mileage he gets in his Hummer)
- "Sarah, if tears could burst through my muscular ducts, I would cry like a baby that's just been hit with a hammer!" (pleading for his old girlfriend, Sarah Sloane, to come back to him)
- "My libido has been terminated." (after learning that his ex girlfriend is dating Ned Flanders)
- [Some time after appearing on Jay Sherman's show] "Sherman, I just realised you insulted me! Now you will die!" [Withdraws a semiautomatic]
- While selling his possessions, including the pornographic movies he made as a young man: (Homer) "Hey, are any of these hetero?" (Wolfcastle) "What's there is there."
- Appearing as a small child in a sausage commercial, sung to the Oscar Mayer tune: "Mein bratwurst has a first name, it's F-R-I-T-Z. Mein bratwurst has a second name, it's S-C-H-N-A-C-K-E-N-P-F-E-F-F-E-R-H-A-U-S-E-N. Fritz Schnackenpfefferhausen has away with B-R-A-T-W-U-R-S-T."
See also
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