The Way We Weren't
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"The Way We Weren't" is the twentieth episode of The Simpsons
Synopsis
When Homer and Bart fight over the use of a beer bottle Bart wants to use to kiss girls, it lands them in the Simpson family court, with Lisa presiding as judge. Marge, giving a testimony, tells the kids that when she was in high school, she had her first kiss with Homer, but Homer confesses that it was not his first kiss. Homer recalls that when he was 10, he went to a camp for underprivileged boys, Camp See-A-Tree, where Homer meets Lenny, Carl, and as a counselor, Moe. It turns out the summer camp is more like a prison and they go to work in the kitchen at a rich girls' camp across the lake that the camp is on. Homer encounters a retainer belonging to a girl who lost it, and he returns it to her. She wants Homer to see her later that night. He tells Bart and Lisa that she was a very pretty girl, until he later met their mother, but Marge admits that she was that girl Homer met.
Marge gives her side of the story, saying that she was with Patty and Selma, Helen Lovejoy, Luann Van Houten and Cookie Kwan at their camp, "Camp Land-A-Man". She meets Homer and they kiss. They agree that the following night they will meet again, but Homer does not come. Marge mentions that she could not respect another boy for years. Homer says he did not return for another date because he fell off a cliff into a lake and drifted to a fat camp, "Camp Flab-Away", which counted Mayor Quimby, Chief Wiggum and Comic Book Guy as its participants. Although Homer escapes the camp to see Marge's camp, Marge leaves the camp only seconds before he arrives, leaving Homer to be attacked by Patty and Selma. Marge now knows the truth and Homer wants Marge to forgive her, but she does not, until Homer and Marge put together the broken halves of a heart from their memory box together.
Notable goofs and criticism of the episode
Notable goofs
- Although Homer tells Bart he has only kissed one person—Marge—in his life, he has previously kissed Mindy Simmons and Lurleen Lumpkin, as well Patty, which is revealed in a flashback in the episode.
- Homer complains about not getting to drink his bottle of beer despite the fact that it was directly poured into his mouth just a moment ago.
- Also, Milhouse did not actually have his first kiss in this episode, despite what he said—he was kissed by Samantha Stankey in the episode "Bart's Friend Falls in Love".
- In the episode, Marge has her hair up, then she puts it down and it turns brown. It turns blue and straight in "The Way We Was" (Marge's hair is brown because she irons it), and Marge expects to put it up in that episode.
- Homer says he met Marge at camp 30 years ago (Homer alludes to Roe v. Wade which was in 1973) when he was ten, and that was in 1974, 30 years before 2004, when the episode aired. However, Homer and Marge were both 17 in 1974 in "The Way We Was", when they graduated from high school. This is due to the fact that the character's age remains the same despite the show always being in the current year. Homer makes a reference to this by saying "or it was the early 60's or maybe even the 50's."
- Yet another goof is that Homer says he met Moe in his flashback. However, in "The Blunder Years", he says he met Moe in his flashback in this episode as well.
Quotes
- Homer: I guess it's row vs. wade, and it's my right to choose.
- Homer: (reading a letter from his old pen pal) Someday, I'll write you back, Osama.
- Homer: I'm Elvis...Elvis Jagger...Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar.
- Bart: Men are dogs. The worse we treat you, the more you want us.
Lisa: That's not what dogs do.
Bart: Lisa said "Dog doo!" - Captain MacAllister: I am the sailing instruct-arrrrr. And on movie night, I run the project-arrrrr. Only PG, nothin' Rrrrrr. Yarrrr.
- Marge: You must be Elvis.
Homer: Elvis?! What kind of name is that- Oh yeah, right. - Homer: Wow, a negro!
Carl: We prefer the term "black".
Moe: Hi! I'm Moe, your junior counselor.
Counselor: Moe's not really a counselor. His parents dropped him off here like two years ago and they never came back for him.
Moe: I sleep under upside-down canoes. - Homer: (washes up on shore)
Fat Camp Counselor: So, thought you could make a break for it, did you? Well no one escapes from Fat Camp! Because the only way out is up a gentle slope. - Camp Counselor: See how Marge has her legs folded under? Honey, you make Jackie O look like a splay-legged milkhorse.
- Marge: I used to walk like this until my tendons snapped. They heard it all the way in Shelbyville.
- Marge: I'm gonna warn you kids. The rest of this story gets a little WB.
- Homer: I don't belong here. Fat Camp Counselor: Your boy bosoms tell a different tale.
- Bart: (to Lisa) What are you doing? If they fight in front of us, we might get new bikes.
- Young Comic Book Guy: Man was not meant to sit up!
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